Monday, August 27, 2012

Being a Writer and Trying to "Have it All"

I've been thinking a lot lately about being a librarian and being a writer, work/life balance, and "having it all." Oh, and let's not forget family. And kids.

So when is it safe to say "I have it all"? And when does "having it all" become too much? 

Apparently I'm not alone in these questions, as this great article from Mark Morford points out. He says, "You cannot really work like a maniac and build a lauded career without sacrificing some level of health and family (and sanity)." Which means, working like crazy doesn't equate to "having it all." A lot gets lost in the process.

I'm very lucky that I have a good job and a loving husband who supports my endeavors.This allows me to revise my novels, send out queries, and do the whole writer thing, which I love.

But even though we're not in a place where we want children yet, there will be a point where we'll have to face that decision. And I'm pretty sure I'm going to have a hard time being a librarian, a writer, and a mother all rolled into one. 

So I've come to terms with the fact that I'll probably have to give up something eventually. But knowing the downfall of working myself to death, I feel a bit more prepared to cross that bridge when I come to it.

Because let's face it--there's only so much that can get done in a day, and in a lifetime--and we cannot lose sight of what's really important. As Morford says, "[Having it all] means being in true alignment. It means being so deeply present, so connected, so alive, so pulsing and breathing and awake in the moment you are in that no matter what your job status, kid status, celebrity status, no matter where you live or to whom you are married, life is already full to bursting."

So by this definition, even though you may not be published yet, or even if your books are published but not yet selling, or even if you're a successful author who feels completely burned out--you can still have it all--if you enjoy the journey, accept accomplishments as they come, and appreciate where your life is now.

Don't get lost in the prospects of "having it all." Instead, take satisfaction in the fact that you are pursuing what you want--and in that, you already have everything you need.


Unknown said...

Love this last line..."Instead, take satisfaction in the fact that you are pursuing what you want--and in that, you already have everything you need." Brilliant post. Thank you for it.

The Writer Librarian said...

Thank you, Tina. It was definitely something I had to tell myself as well! :)

Petra said...

HA! I am so glad you wrote about this. I struggle with this a lot. We should chat sometime. It is hard, work, relationships, creative life, future (we don't want/have kids)It's just really nice to know other creative people at the same point in life who feel the same way about where they are and where they want to be.

The Writer Librarian said...

@Petra--we definitely should chat! Are you on Facebook? Twitter? There's a Petra in Libba Bray's Beauty Queens, a great book I'm reading right now. :)

Anonymous said...

Greetings from a fellow librarian :)

Yes! This is something I've been struggling with during the last few weeks and finding your post kind of made it all seem worthwhile.

The Writer Librarian said...

@emperatrix Wow, thank you! I'm so glad you found the post helpful--sometimes it helps when we can look back at negative experiences and see what they really mean. I hope things continue to look up for you!